Sunday, February 24, 2013


When I first started working at Superior Dairy, I was 17 years old and as hayseed as they come.  I was raised you don't drink, you don't smoke and for GAWDS sakes don't get tattoos and you don't date those who do.

Well, my first day on the job, I was shocked.  There were women there who actually smoked, drank, had tattoos and on top of everything else they were mostly divorced.  OMG how was I going to be able to work around these slutty women.  Don't worry I soon became used to their sinful ways because I was afraid they would  put me in a 50 gallon drum and haul me off to the dump.  I learned to kiss a$$ at a very early age out of fear for my life.  Seriously, one woman actually shot her husband through the roof of her house.  He was on the roof she was inside and apparently shot through the ceiling and got the bastard.  If you think I'm going to mess with the likes of her forget it!!  So, I didn't mess with them and they didn't mess with me. 

I believe my views have softened on social issues because my children have just plain crushed my soul.  Their knack of NOT following the parental guidelines I have set before them has forced me to join them rather than beat them to death.  I've come a long way since being 17.  I now don't judge people on whether they drink, smoke, been divorced or have tattoos.  There are some very nice people in those categories actually. 

Once again, I was texting my older daughter Sam.  I was merely checking in with her because I have not heard much since Ben has been home from nearly a year away in Afghanistan.  

Me:  What's up?

2 hours later:

Sam:  Nothing, just getting a tattoo. 

Okay, let me fill you in.  The very day Sam turned 18 she got a tattoo.  No, she didn't get permission or tell me, I read a text and found it out.  (It’s on her side/stomach; it looks like the Jack and the Bean stock stock) Actually as tattoos goes it's pretty tasteful. It is black and white, and it's about 3 feet long. When she was pregnant it grew to about six feet long. (Okay that's probably an exaggeration)  Still I was appalled that she actually thought her 18th birthday meant something because to me the age doesn't matter, it's where the fiscal responsibility stops and starts that matters.  You house my rules?  Yea, whatever.  My kids wrote their own rules.

Child number two aka Sarah got herself inked. (doesn't that sound like she's a prisoner in the pen or something?) She drew hers herself.  It's a character and it's between a sheep and a goat.  She named him Vincent, I call him Leonard.  It’s on her foot.  Then a couple years later, she did the tattoo no no no....she got a name of a boyfriend tattooed on her shoulder. WTH....where did I go wrong?  The only time you get a name tattooed on your person is if they died or if it's a child.  I mean I suppose I could get John's name tattooed after 28 years, but why?  My worry would be when the archeologist digs me up hundreds of years from now they will think my name was John.  The name Bobbie Jean is bad enough.  Anyway, just last year Sarah covered up Joseph and replaced it with a dang big bird that looks like that bird Edgar Allen Poe wrote about......Said the Raven.....Nevermore.  It seriously gives me the creeps. 

Want to hear about Jonathan's tattoo?  There's nothing to tell, the good son doesn't have one.  Okay, back to Sam's Text.

Me:  What tattoo are you getting do tell?
Sam:  I'm starting a sleeve.
Me:  Hahahahah you are so funny.
Sam:  don't freak out, I'm seriously starting a sleeve, it doesn't even go to my elbow.
Me:  Ben said he didn't want you to get a tattoo and now he's allowing a sleeve?  Really? 
Sam:  He suggested it.  Don't worry, I have to re-schedule and come back next week.

Okay so now I have time to kick Ben's ass prior to the appointment. 

Sam:  I pinned it on pinterest if you want to see it. 

So I went to her "Tattoo board" and found all kinds of tattoos.  Some I liked and some not so much.  This is the one she wants.

Pinned Image

I don't get to vote, but if I did, my vote would be something like the one below:  I like tattoos with meaning.  I actually want to get one myself.  I like Angelina Jolies tattoos where she has the coordinates tattooed where each of her children were born.  Now that has meaning. 

Or Even this one: 

:Pinned Image

The following bible verse is what' I'm getting on my shoulder or maybe down my spine.  You know.....something biblical.

Proverbs 30:17  The eye that mocks a father and scorns to obey a mother will be picked out by the ravens of the valley and eaten by the vultures.......

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