Saturday, September 15, 2012

Bobbie's View on Being Politically Correct...I Will Never Be a Candidate for the Supreme Court

I've been trying to tell you for the past 9 months, and I hope you are hearing me loud and clear, I AM AN ODD BALL.  I don't view things the same way that others do.  I do not look at life the same way that most people do.  I'm a God made mediator. I try to help everyone in an argument see the other person's side.   I tend to ride the fence on a lot of issues because I can usually see both sides.

I sometimes find humor in things most people don't find funny. When playing Words With Friends, I try to make words that mean something to me rather than being strategic to get words that rack up the most points.  For instance, If I have the letters to form the word POOP, I go with the word POOP over some other word that could give me twice as many points.  Humor should be worth double in my opinion. I'm usually not politically correct.  I use words that some may find offensive.  Frankly, politically correct cramps my style because I can't be me.  People probably wouldn't appreciate the real me.  My friends like the real me.  My husband loves the real me. Quite honestly, he's as bigger ass than I am.  Speaking of big asses.  I have one.  (no his name's not John) I will use myself as an example as to not offend anyone.  I have a big ass....I am fat.  I guess there are a lot of ways we, being politically correct, have to refer to my heftiness. Below is a list of ways we can be politically correct and my interpretation will be in parenthesis next to it.

Bobbie is a little chunky-   (Bobbie is Fat)
Bobbie is heavy (no, she's fat)
Bobbie has a pretty face (Bobbie is Fat, but she could be pretty if she lost weight)  I alwyas say it's best not to be both fat and ugly.
That outfit looks good on you (it doesn't make you look AS fat)

Sarah:  My Dentist reminds me of you
Me:  Why is she fat?

See, my point is even if you don't use the politically correct "word", I yam what I yam.....FAT.  It doesn't change the meaning.  OK, let's move on.

I find facebook to be interesting.  I have 200 Plus "friends" and it's kind of like having kids, they are all different.  There are those that are super emotional and dramatic.  To these "friends" everyday is some sort of drama. I swear they must live in a state of upset all the time.   I have artsy friends.  My artsy friends don't just see a flower they SEE A FLOWER with God's face shining in the center of it, with glistening dew drops dropping from the petals and the shadow it casts is an orb from a dead relative.   Me?  I see flower.  Yes, it's a pretty flower, but it's still just a flower.  I have flowers in my back yard, that somehow, John was able to bring back from the dead after Sarah tried to euthanize them in the 95 degree heat while we were on vacation.   There are people who are all about the peace, tranquility, harmony, love, meditation, breathing.  I get it,  I really do, it's just well, I'm tainted I guess.  I'm more of a I get up, go to work, fight to keep my head above water, don't take people's crap (make sure I don't dish it out either), go home and pray for a good nights sleep with no child waking me saying they have a flat tire or wrecked the car.  NOW THAT'S A GOOD DAY!  I don't like war, but I certainly believe we will have it around forever and I would prefer our country stay militarily strong.  Does that mean I don't love peace.  Hell yes I love peace.  I'm taking Monday off just so I can get some peace.  As for national peace, I'm not counting on it.

I am not a good candidate for a suicide prevention hot line,  OK, so don't call me to talk you off the ledge, unless, of course you REALLY want to wake up dead.  I'm not afraid of death, however I am afraid of the torture that may lead up to my death.  This torture could be mental or physical...who knows what God has planned.  

So there you have it.  I'm really a nice person.  I never ever want to hurt anyone's feelings, so I find myself being politically correct as to try not to hurt anyone's feelings, but geez, this thing is only going to grow and grow and grow.  Why do we have to be so thinned skinned?  Why is a word or phrase we used to use suddenly deemed improper or offensive?  Who decides that?   I don't care if it's the word cripple, midget, short person, fat person, etc etc....  In fact the word little person sounds way worse to me than midget.  OK, I'm stopping now because I'm sure on my way to offending some of you or all of you. 


  1. I'm completely on board with the "Little Person" vs. "Midget" rule. I thot it was a joke the first time someone told me that. It sounds way worse to me.

  2. Claim to be an odd ball all you want. Claim to be whatever you want. Label yourself in anyway that you see fit. But know that you're not any one of these things and all of them all at the same time. You're just Bobbie and the best one I've ever met. You are great in so many ways, at so many things but I'll never ask you to be my dentist or the pilot for my next flight. You just don't have the skills and you know it. That's all I hear you saying... everyone, just be proud of who you are and all the gifts you do have and ignore all the a$$holes out there who want to tell you that you are or aren't something you are or aren't... unless it's true. Then own it, laugh at it, celebrate it and move on.

    There is so much more to this rant. Let it fly. I want to read the rest of it...