Well blogger people....I'm afraid I've milked this illness, surgery stuff for all it's worth and now it's time to head back to work. Now, before you start worrying about what I'm going to say, let me put your mind at ease.....this post will NOT get me fired. Secondly, if it does, remember when God slams a door, he opens a window....or something like that. He squeezes you through some other hole to a better life. But it is NOT going to get me fired right away anyway.
I always said I was going to write a book of Business slogans or the phrases most used in meetings. I think it would be cool to make bingo cards and when these phrases are used in a meeting and you won you would yell something turrets like. Here are our most used business cliches.
As we Move forward we need to.....(usually used in a speech)
As we take this to its logical conclusion... ( I have no idea what that really even means)
We need to think outside the box
Focus on the low hanging fruit ( as opposed to the ones we can't reach)
....Attack the giants
We are living in a land of giants
Strategic planning
Create Competitive advantage.
Circle the wagon (huh?)
Circle Back (between these two I'm dizzy)
Streamline
Our current business model (zzz, snore, drewl....this one would fix my insomnia problem)
At the end of the day......(I'm exhausted)
We need to bring to the table.....(FOOD!)
We need to grow the business
NEVER SAY NEVER.....(this one is what they live by, these people never give up)
Bobbie will take the lead on this thing......(generally my head is down and I'm texting from my lap, when I hear this....like a kid in high school, I have no idea what I just got volunteered to do)
Though I don't miss the meetings I'm required to attend, being at home listening to the media, is about as trying and actually more mind numbing. I don't have specific phrases for media but I have a lot of words:
Global Economy
unemployment
health care
Obama Care
Trayvon
Racism
Gas prices (um just so everyone remembers, gas prices were high under Bush also)
Campaign garbage (both sides)
Aspirin between the knees?????? What? That joke is so old, but so was the idiot that repeated it who probably was at one time faking a headache so he could get the aspirin from between his wife's knees. We act like birth control is just for women.....THEY ARE HAVING SEX WITH MEN! Unless men want children to support, I would suggest they care about birth control also. OH I digresssss.
I guess my point is brief....no matter where you are and what you're doing there is something to annoy. You may as well make money being annoyed as sitting at home, being annoyed and poor. John and I have been fortunate to have never had to fight for a job and worry about making a house payment. For that we are grateful. I never ever feel like I "work for the man" Oh, business can be infuriating, don't get me wrong, I could write a book.....but, As my right wing mother says and it's true.."I've never been hired by a poor man" We can say what we want about "the man", but he provides the jobs we sometimes love to hate.
When I'm home I pretend I'm sitting in Barbara Walters seat on The View....OMGosh she irritates me to death! At work, I just pretend I'm important and get paid for it.
So hi ho, hi ho, It's back to work I go. (Monday)
(Besides, I couldn't talk the Dr into removing anything else)
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