POOR POOR DOGGY

The hysterectomy couch and chair arrived.  I really do like it.  Though I'm not a covetous person. I was gifted some money and this is what was truly needed.  (I don't even think we can GIVE the last couch away it's that bad)  I like to take care of what I'm blessed to have, but it never fails....the harder I try the worser it gets. ( yes, I know that's not a real word)

First the furniture arrived and as the truck was pulling away, I noticed that the chair had a bum leg.  The chair is a wing back type chair.  The leg looked so crooked that if you were to sit on it it would just snap.   I'm not a very irate person so I call to see what they can do for us and oh the best they can do is come look at it in a week.   Had we been difficult people we probably should have said, no, just bring us a new chair, but we really try to work with people.  The service guy came he and says "Yea, that leg is not right"  Gee thanks Sherlock, I believe I already solved that mystery.  He then says he will come back and get it in another week, take it to the shop, fix it and return it by the following week.  Apparently there is something magical about a "Week"   Now that I'm not dying, I guess I have nothing but time, so what's a week or two.

Then there's the damn dog.  I know, I know all you animal lovers, she's just a dog.  I want a dog that can talk like a human please.  She's not stupid, but I can't get her to read the memo concerning the new couch.  We humans, totally understand that we took away her bed, but we didn't just take it away with out replacing it with a more suitable bed for her. We got her a ginormous soft, plush doggie bed.  Other dogs would be so jealous if they saw this thing.  Granted it matches the decor of the room, but being the diva she is she should appreciate that.

 We have tried everything, from spreading the pillows out on the couch so she won't jump up, to when we go to bed we put a dining room chair on the couch and the chair that guarantees she won't get up on it.  This last trick however kind of ruins what I was trying to accomplish with the new couch to begin with. John heard that putting mouse traps up on the couch works, that seems a bit wrong to me.  I don't need turned into the humane society.  I've managed not to have the kids taken away I think I should be able to keep the dog.  

So dog lovers.....any suggestions?  Because She is obviously depressed over the situation: