Sunday, February 12, 2012


Ten years ago this July my best friend died of cancer.  I remember specifically asking God why.  I didn't ask Him why for me, but why He would take a young mother away from her very young children.  This week there were two deaths where mothers were taken away from their children.  Both were sudden deaths.  One was a car accident and one was I believe a heart attack. also there was another situation where a co-worker of mine lost her seven month old grand baby.  The baby never made it home from the hospital, but he fought and fought and defied all kinds of obstacles only to die in the end.    My heart breaks for these families.  My human nature has me asking why. 

When I was given my diagnosis, I never asked why.  All I had ever asked God was to get my kids raised.  After that, life is all bonus.  I have asked God many times to take from me and make sure these kids are ok.  There is no amount of sacrifice I wouldn't make for their happiness.  I love them so.

I always think of something I read once that said " we rarely ask God why when something good happens, why ask him why when something bad happens"  I try to remember this, but sometimes human nature does take over. 

The why question I've been asking lately is this.....why did these young mothers have to be ripped from their children? After seven months of many surgeries and fighting so hard, why did baby Tyler not make it?  Why did I get good news this week about cancer being caught very early and probably even gone, when there are people and close friends who were not fortunate enough to get that same opportunity.  Some are fighting, some are already gone.  I think I have survivor guilt in a way.   In my opinion, I would have been a better option than the three women and the little baby above. 

What I do know is God is God. He knows everything.  He sees the entire puzzle.  He has all the pieces.  We can only see so far.  We have to continue to trust, hope, pray and simply be there for those around us.  We need to be a blessing.  I feel so blessed this last month, not only for the good news, but even more importantly for the great friends, the great family and all the people I don't even know who showed up.  I hope I will be as big of a blessing to all of them as they have been to me!


  1. Beautiful Bobbie....just beautiful.

  2. you already are! When Jess was diagnosed with MS, I prayed and cried and begged God to give it to me not her but that was not His plan. I have come to the conclusion that He knows why and I have to have the faith to trust Him. It hurts to see her having rough days but as we said when she was diagnosed, they didn't tell her 6 months and out so we can deal. I think of Chris all the time and the blessings she was to many. Even through her illness. I will never forget walking into her hospital room and her looking at me and smiling and saying "I'm going home, Nanc, I mean really home!" I collapsed and cried when I left that room but she was praising God. Wow. God knows we don't understand and He knows we are going to question him but He knows, I guess that is enough. At that I don't understand the death of these young mothers and that baby also but we don't have to understand just have faith that He is in control. I am so glad to have you be a part of our lives and you are a blessing to many. Because of this you may be the encouragement another needs. Don't have survivors guilt just live each day to the fullest and praise Him for each one. He is in control not us! Thank you for being a blessing!